Summer holiday time. The Pattinson family is spending its summer holiday in Stockholm.
Why Stockholm? It was Andrew's choice. Just like me, he dissolves into sweat the moment the temperature hits 20.000000000001 degrees C. He was dead disappointed when we arrived yesterday. With the weather: sunny and warm. I bet he plumps for Iceland next year. He's already started softening me up. "It's dead cheap now, dad. Since their economy collapsed. Things only cost a third of what they used to, when you pay in euros." I didn't spoil things by pointing out that everything used to be four times the price of Holland.
There hasn't been much time for dragging the kids around pubs yet. I did get them into one, just around the corner from our hotel. An American-themed sports bar. They insisted we went in. Really. OK, they were starving and wanted a cooked meal. I wasn't desperate to eat, but I thought I'd join them in a little snack. Things didn't work out quite as planned.
I had 650 crowns on me. That's about 60 euros. Surely plenty. I carefully added up the price of the kids food and drinks. 460 crowns. What a choice. If I ate, there wouldn't be enough money for a beer. No contest, really. I had two Carnegie Porters. A liquid meal, of sorts.
With the kids safely locked in hotel, there was time for parent time. The special parent time. Just like the happy time (before the kids were born.) I was prepared for exactly that eventuality. I've two pubs in my Stockholm Pub Guide that are on the same island as our hotel, Kungsholmen. The Nils Oscar Bar and Mackinlay's Inn. Within spitting distance of each other, too.
My guides are renowned for their detail and accuracy. It's just keeping them all up to date is a pain in the arse. My Stockholm guide really needs attention. Just as well I'm here. The Nils Oscar Bar was nowhere to be found. Oh well, at least Mackinlays Inn was at hand.
We found a seat at the back and took a look at the beer menu. There was a whole row of stuff from Nynäshamns Ångbryggeri. Dolores had a pint of Bedarö Bitter. I went for a Brännskär Brown Ale. What can I say. I've rarely drunk something that tasted less like a Brown Ale. Way too bitter. And with all the wrong malt flavours. It tasted like bitter gall. As did Dolores's beer. We only had the one.
Why don't you switch off your smartphone and go out and do something less boring instead? - ... such as coming to one of my summer festival events? This weekend it's the Stoke Newington Literary Festival. Set up by my wife Liz in 2010, it's now be...
3 hours ago